Wednesday, January 25, 2006

kill me now

So, I went to the doctor, again, yesterday. It wasn't for me, my husband had another appointment with his asthma doctor. Anyhow, this time, I got up enough "chutzpah" to weigh myself. You see, it's been 3 months since I gave up my two pack a day Marlboro habit and I've been shoving candy (and anything else that will give me a sense of satisfaction) in my mouth to stop the cravings. Long story ... short. Kill me, now .... please. I've gained 30 (not 10, not 15, not 20) 30 pounds. And, with the long history of diabeties in my family, this news has alot more implications than just needing new pants. As those of you who read this know, in the past few months, I've given up a 20 year pill habit, and a 20 year cigarette habit and now they want me to give up my food habit. Can't be done. Might as well just give up. I mean, I can give up the candy and the chocolate and the cake, but, no way, absolutely, no way, can I or would I, give up my lifesblood, in other words "Coke". I've been drinking it for as long as I've been drinking and yes, I know, it's horrible for a person (takes paints off of cars ... heard it all) but it's the only thing keeping me going. And, no, diet crap just tastes like diet crap. So, I'm going to be one plump sonova)*)*&. It's either that, or give me back my pills or cigarettes. I'm not picky, I'll take either one or both. C'mon what's a few more added years to your life. There're only the drooling and shitting years. This is fat and not happy signing off.

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